Second

Have you ever thought about how much stressful and/or boring must be the lives of “number ones”? People always dream about one day becoming the number one on something: the top one player, the top one worker, the top one winner, the top one lover, etc. But, they don’t realize the price paid when you achieve that status. First of all, number ones don’t have any motivation whatsoever to get better – “why should I try to get better? There is no one better than me anyways?”. So they get bored. Number two, on the other hand, has a very clear goal: to beat the number one! Back to the number one, a second problem is the fact that number ones are broadly and deeply hated by all the other numbers – yes, they do envy the number one, and for that reason they keep planning behind their back to “bring that sucker down, who the hell does he think he is?! Just because he got to the top does not mean anything, and we’ll show him!”. Number two, on the other hand, is that cool guy who people admire for constantly fighting for the first spot. Similar facts regarding number ones can occur in other occasions in life. For instance, suppose some lottery first prize has reached 2 billion dollars, and the second prize is just a mediocre 200 thousand dollars. Which one would you rather win? Well, let’s go with the assumption you want to go with the first prize, what would happen? First, you’ll get tons of new friends with high expectations on your money; you’ll also be surrounded by beautiful women again with a peculiar interest in your assets. People will sue you left and right, lawyers will be your best friends; terrorists, assassins and mundane thieves will be watching your steps no matter where you go… If you’d have chosen the second prize, you’d have taken your 100 thousand bucks (don’t forget about the taxes…), and everyone would be thinking: “poor creature, almost got the first prize, but ended up with a consolation one – I wish him all the good luck next time!”. Meanwhile you’ll be enjoying life with your prize, while everyone else’s eyes are on the winner. Hopefully you got my point by now. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that if you are number one bad things will happen to you. All I’m saying is that if you are number one, it is very likely that bad things will happen to you.
Therefore, I present you the second place of the Squash Seattle City League 2005-2006, division C, receiving his prize at the Space Needle!!!

Hair

So you're getting bald!? Welcome to the club! I know exactly how you must be feeling. In fact, I know exactly what's on your mind now:
"Oh my God, I'm really getting bald!!
Will people make fun of me?
Will I look older?
Will I look uglier?
Will I start envying hairy guys?"
There are some bad news and good news, my friend. I'll be straight on the bad news: the bad news is that the answer is yes to all the questions above. But no worries, there are good news. Well, I'll get back to the good news shortly.
I'm convinced, though, that hair, or I should say lack of it, is a sign of evolution: tell me, what is the purpose of hair other than esthetical? Some say that "the purpose of hair is to protect the head!". Sure, as you've ever seen news like this one:

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CNN Online News - 04/12/06
Young boy's hair saves his life
By Wally Olecram

A fourteen year old boy from Missouri had his life spared thanks to his dense, fluffy hair. John "globetrotter" Guy Junior was victim of an auto accident when coming back from a party in downtown Seattle, last Friday night. He lost control of the vehicle which smashed against a concrete wall at about 140 mph. At the time of the accident, the seat belt of his Mercedes Bens broke instantaneously, and John was launched head first against the concrete wall. "I felt as if someone had just given me an unfriendly pat on my head", said the boy, who miraculously only suffered minor scratches, thanks to his dense hair. "I never imagined it would save my life one day", says John. "I only thought it was kind of cool, you know". John is expected to patent this hair-bag idea, will appear in Oprah and Larry King Live, and he is thinking about writing a book about the incident. "The book will be called 'It is not about the Hair - a story of a survivor'", says John's lawyer McClaim, who told CNN that his client is filing a lawsuit against Mercedes Bens on the seat belt issue. Mercedes Bens has not issued any official note regarding the incident yet.
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Yeah, right…
Some claim bald guys are smarter than hairy ones. Honestly, I don’t have at hand any concrete scientific evidence to prove or disprove this claim. The most I could do was randomly search the net for bald and non-bald folks. My completely random search produced the following results:
Bald Guys: http://nobelprize.org/physics/laureates/2004/index.html
Non Bald Guys: http://www.cfo.doe.gov/me70/history/images/Bush062003.jpg
But again, it is hard to come up with any conclusion. Well, I know I haven’t told you yet the good news about being bald, but I’ll keep thinking. If you’re still frustrated about your upcoming baldness, however, here is my advice: shave it off, buy a nice, expensive leather jacket, exchange your car by a neat motorcycle, and in a blink of an eye you’ll go from this “old, bald guy…” to a “cool, awesome dude!! “
Peace out!